Shame, Shamelessness, and Narcissism Shame sometimes looks like its opposite. When our shame becomes unbearable, it twists into an intractable shamelessness. Then we can hurt others without remorse. Unless something stokes our pride or satisfies our lust, it means nothing to us. When we are shameless, no consequence society can enforce will affect us. No matter how ferocious or ingenious, punishments cannot squeeze remorse from an indifferent heart. Catcalls, beatings, imprisonment, banishment might sting, but only those who entertain the possibility that they have done wrong will be moved to change. The shameless feel offended by chastisement. They see themselves as victims. Thus, they defend themselves from condemnation by condemning…
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Rahab, Delilah, and Making Righteous Choices
To the Victor Lies the Story When the battle is over and the dust has settled, the victor frames the story. The vanquished, if they survive, create myths of their own, of course, but since they’re unlikely to mesh with those of their new rulers, the official tale will come from the one who conquered, like American history books written to glorify the white man. In recent years we have begun to be more honest about our past, at least in some parts of our country, but our human tendency is to understand the story from our perspective, to justify our actions, and to condemn those who acted against us.…