Coming Together Around Suffering Few of us will be sorry to see 2020 go. Although some of us have remained financially secure, barely noticing the isolation or natural disasters or political upheaval, for most of us, this year has been filled with loneliness, uncertainty, anger, boredom, and despair. To cope, some people have numbed themselves with substances or other addictions. Protests have turned violent as people feel powerless in the face of repeated assaults. Domestic violence has escalated, as have mental health crises, suicides, and homicides. It has been a year of suffering. Of course, stress is always with us. Suffering is part of life. Indeed, if there were no…
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Christmas: A Miracle or Not?
The Story in Matthew Christmas is coming. On that day, Christians around the world honor the birth of their Savior. In story, film, pageant, painting, and song, they recount the miracle of his birth to a virgin mother. They share the joy of the shepherds and magi when they hear the news. Although embellished over the years to include such niceties as a drummer boy and a babushka, the Christmas story originated in the gospels of Matthew and Luke. Let’s look, for instance, at the Gospel of Matthew. The author writes: When his mother Mary had been engaged to Joseph, but before they lived together, she was found to be…
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Hanukkah and Becoming
Hanukkah and Identity You could say Hanukkah is about identity. Most Jewish holidays are. On these special days, Jews around the world tell stories, recite prayers, and play games that have been shared and chanted and enjoyed by their ancestors for thousands of years. The history and heritage that infuse these holy days helps define who is Jewish and who is not. But what does it mean to be a Jew these days? Especially in the United States, many Jews practice a lackadaisical faith, if they practice one at all. I’m reminded of the non-practicing Catholic patient recently told me, “Once a Catholic, always a Catholic.” She didn’t have to…
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Shema: Listen and Respond
The Shema and Obedience The religions of the book emphasize obedience to God. The name “Islam,” for instance, comes from an Arabic word that means submission. Christians have the model of Jesus who followed the will of his God the Father. “Not my will, but yours,” he said. In the Jewish faith, we can see how important obedience is in a prayer observant Jews recite every morning and evening, the Shema. Shema, Yisrael, the prayer begins, or “Hear, O Israel.” Shema means listen or hear, but it also means obey. If we think about it, that makes sense. After all, we can’t obey if we don’t listen first, and we…
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Uncertainty and Doing What Is at Hand
Uncertainty Surrounds Us Uncertainty is the water we swim in. We know there will be shallows, eddies, rocks, white water, but we float down the river convinced those hazards are meant for someone else. Those whose bones have broken on boulders in the past may take extra care, wrapping themselves in padding or constructing boxes in which to hide, for we often learn something from our past. Nonetheless, we easily forgot and ignore our vulnerability. We humans have many ways to protect ourselves. We can push people away by being nasty or irrational, by isolating, by acting crazy. Numbness and addiction keep us from feeling the pain of our past…
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Gratitude Amidst Oneness
Our Instinct to Survive We humans are born with an instinct to survive. When our lives are threatened, we get anxious and fight back or seek assistance. That’s because we perceive ourselves to be separate individuals. Many of us understand ourselves to be unique and valuable, as well. Even if we believe in a life after death, we tend to want to preserve our individual, unique, and valuable self. A number of religions, such as Buddhism, Hinduism, and Pantheism, teach that this belief in an individual self is an illusion. If so, it is an illusion that has a purpose. It keeps us going in the face of hardship and…
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Healing Ourselves and Our Nation
Our Hurting Nation Our need for healing is evident. Like much of the rest of the world, we in the United States are in the midst of a pandemic that is overwhelming our capacity to provide care for the sick. Even if we will soon be able to control the virus physiologically, we will continue to reel from the emotional wounds the illness has wrought. Some of our elected officials have minimized the suffering this disease has caused, and minimizing intensifies pain. Because of the virus, tens of millions of people have lost jobs, and barely half of them have found new ones. [1] Social isolation has increased the incidence…
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The Stoics, Virtue, and Happiness
The Stress of These Times For anyone who has paid attention, this 2020 presidential election has been stressful. Now that we have a winner – and a loser – perhaps we can breathe. Yes, our current president is seeking salvation in the courts, but that’s not likely to happen. The threats of his followers may turn to violence, but the police and national guard are preparing themselves. The voting process was more peaceful than some of us feared. I suspect the transition in the White House will be as well. Around the country, there are calls for healing. It’s a wonderful idea, and I hope our next president and his…
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In the Beginning Was Love
In the Beginning In the beginning, there was Love, and Love longed for a beloved, and out of that longing, the world was formed, the creatures created, and we humans born. Love is our birthright. Every child comes into this world with a seed of love lodged in its chest. Sometimes the seed flourishes, blossoming into a wild and fragrant flower. At other times, the seed is crushed or parched, so that instead of love, bitterness grows. Yet we are made for love, and we all have the ability to find our way back to our birthright. The Christian story tells of a God who loves his creation, loves his…
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That No One Have Holes
No Holes The old woman in Catherynne M. Valente’s novel, Deathless, has no name, yet she still suffers. Her soldier son, Vitaliy, died when a bullet pierced him through. Even so, when Ivan Tsarevich wanders by, a stranger to the woman as she is a stranger to him, she invites him into her home. She shows him the food on the plates and tells him to eat. He should eat, he should get fat, he should live. “Be alive,” she tells him. She says this because she knows about holes. Her son died because of the hole inside him, and she, too, has a hole “like a bullet” in her…